


After All These Years

by YRTHere



Category: NCT (Band), WAYV
Genre: M/M, Mutual Pining, Song Inspired, personal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-02
Updated: 2020-08-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:22:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,081
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25668142
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YRTHere/pseuds/YRTHere
Summary: 'Cause after all these yearsI still feel everything when you are nearThe bittersweet love of two.Inspired by All These Years - Camila
Relationships: Dong Si Cheng | WinWin/Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun
Comments: 8
Kudos: 18





	After All These Years

**Author's Note:**

> This is a little personal story. Its short but ... it has a lot of meanings. Scroll to read the end note if you want to hear my tragic story hahaha.

_Your hair's grown a little longer_   
_Your arms look a little stronger_

Sicheng stared at the figure in front of him. How long has it been this time? He smiled softly to himself. Noticing the new hair do, the length, just a little longer than a while back. His gaze turned to the male’s toned arms. He was always fit, nothing new, maybe it is because of the weight he lost, he looks a little skinnier? Somehow he wished his waist was wrapped in those strong arms once again. 

_Your eyes just as I remember_   
_Your smile's just a little softer_

Jaehyun stole a quick glance at the chinese male beside him, lips curving upwards instinctively. He noticed how the male’s eyes were still the same. So pure, so bright, full of vibrant energy. Those phoenix eyes were as enchanting as ever. He looked a little more mature. Jaehyun caught sight of the smile on the man’s face as a warm glance was sent his way. A warm feeling appeared, an all-so-familiar feeling. 

_And I, and I never prepared for a moment like that_   
_Yeah, in a second it came all back, it all came back_

The two stood side by side, camera on them. The quick glances, the subtle smiles, how they hope neither would be caught. When their eyes met, a spark that was thought to have disappeared, reappeared again. They were not prepared, the thumping of heartbeats were loud. What was once so familiar washed over, holding in their laughs. 

_'Cause after all these years_   
_I still feel everything when you are near_   
_And it was just a quick hello_   
_And you had to go_   
_And you probably will never know_   
_You're still the one I'm after all these years_

Memories flashed, the outings, the practices, autumn that is just around the corner as well, the scenery and fun. How many years already? You were still the same, so warm, so kind, so familiar. The moment lasted for a second before the scene changed and they were split again. Jaehyun’s arms itched to pull him back, watching Sicheng’s shadow disappear. Again. 

“You look happier today.” Minhyuk said. 

Jaehyun turned to his co-host. “Am I?” 

“You can’t even hide that grin.” Minhyuk replied, returning his attention to his phone. 

Jaehyun sat in his seat. Fingers on his phone, on a certain chat, typing and deleting sentences. What should he say? I miss you? How are you? Hello? Frustrated, he turned it off and chucked the device aside. Still seeing him today, Jaehyun couldn't help but smile. Feelings he had hidden away, how does one go about dealing with them now that the one he has been chasing for now appeared. 

Where do you find the courage to tell your bestfriend you like them? The butterflies he makes you feel, the feeling of smiling when you see his boxy smile, his expressions when studying, his little habits, his heartbeat. The way his hands would fit yours so nicely. Jaehyun sighed, afterall he still had a show to finish. 

_Couldn't help but overhear you_   
_Sounds like you're happy with her_   
_But does she kiss you like I kissed you?_

Scrolling through all Jaehyun’s social media, their chats from before. A soft look adorned his face. How many times does this make it? He recalled the times they hung out in the past, now he has more friends he could rely on. He had more people he would spend time with. An itching feeling came back. Sicheng knows that he was just one of them, there will come a time when someone would take that place. Still, he wanted to be the one beside him, the one reason for his smile. 

_Ooh, I wish I loved you like I miss you_   
_And I, and I never prepared for a moment like that_   
_Yeah, in a second it came all back, it all came back_

Under the disguise of being friends, how long can you hide your feelings? Every touch, look and thought was him. All these feelings came hitting back like a truck. It was so sudden, a warm, tingling feeling the moment we met. ‘I want to hold your hands but not as friends. I stare at your lips more than I should. I crave for you more than I could ever get.’ They thought.

_'Cause after all these years_   
_I still feel everything when you are near_   
_And it was just a quick hello_   
_And you had to go_   
_And you probably will never know_   
_You're still the one I'm after all these years, oh_

How he wished Jaehyun would have pulled him back. All these years, it has and will always be him. But Sicheng will never let it show, even if he has to remain as his bestfriend for the rest of his life, he is content, if it makes Jaehyun happy. 

‘If you’re happy, so am I’ he thought silently to himself. ‘Even if you might never know this’. When did it start? Even he didn't know anymore. It probably started when you reached out. The times we spent together multiplied. We couldn’t breath. The distance slowly decreased. Unwanted, complicated feelings, oh how suffocating.

_'Cause after all these years_   
_I still feel everything when you are near_   
_And it was just a quick hello_   
_And you had to go_   
_And you probably will never know_   
_You're still the one I'm after all these years_

Jaehyun sat in his car, content with today. The phone in his grip was a picture he had taken with Sicheng behind the scene. “I’m glad to have seen you again. Even though you might never know how I feel. Let's meet again” Holding on to every piece of memories spent together. 

Sicheng plugged in his earpiece, playing the playlist full of songs Jaehyun had listened to. His home screen finally had a new photo after months. “I love you but you will never know. But it’s fine.” He turned to face the scenery from in the car. “Looks like autumn is coming soon huh?” he muttered, lost in his thoughts as the rest of the members were busy with their own things.

The two stared at the now turning yellow leaves, some falling, reminded of that autumn day. Smiling, they shared the same sentiments, feelings and thoughts but...

_I never told you, I should've told you_   
_I never told you after all these years_   
_I never told you after all these years_

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading. Right. So. Context.
> 
> I fell for someone who was very close, like our moms are good friends and Ive known him for about 14 years now. I liked him for a little longer than 6 years and it took a lot of people for me to find out. We grew distant after a while, different lifestyle and graduation. I confessed last year knowing I would be rejected. Like literally in my confession, I rejected myself and yeah I did get rejected. We decided to remain as friends but he will never know how much it is going to take me. I told myself he had a girlfriend who was a girl in his instastory, they went on a date? but fate plays me and his best friend who is my friend too publicly told me he doesnt have one. Not wanting to make things awkward Im trying to move on but each time I see him and all it get fuzzy but of course I acted normal. So ... if any of you ever like someone I wish you good luck and I hope you will find happiness like how i hope he will find his. :)


End file.
